Story of Meera
When I was 19 I had to deal with sexual violence. I had been raped. This is something I have been carrying with me for 11 years. To this day I haven’t been able to process this, but I have turned my sorrow and vulnerability into strength. My company ‘Stage & Stories’ was born from this pain, among other things. How difficult it was to tell my loved ones what happened to me before the recording of LINDA.nl, cannot be expressed in words. This was one of the most painful things I’ve ever done. But I thought and still think it is necessary to share my story. Especially since I support breaking taboos.
I preferred to close my eyes to the darkness that had taken the light away from me. Asking for help was therefore too big of a step. But in all these years I have had periods when my heartache surfaced. During one of those periods I contacted a psychologist. We weren’t a match and from then on I decided to cut myself off again and blind myself with guilt. Rationally I knew these were out of place, but emotionally this was a different story. My ratio and feeling have not been able to make that connection. After gathering all my courage, I contacted the police to file a report (as can also be heard in the episode). Only my declaration has never been recorded. The officer advised me against this because it had been too long and it would be my word against his. I understood, but I looked for justice and recognition for my grief and I did not get it. I put it aside and turned in, locked my tears, and got on with my life. At the time I did not know that you can also make a report. I was not told this by the police. After 11 years of inner fighting with myself, I have now contacted the police and decided to make a report.
I did not get the help I longed for. But Stage & Stories has given me my vote. The voice to raise awareness and protect others, to protect yourself. What you say to yourself can heal you, but it can also break you. Asking for and demanding help is extremely important and essential to your healing process. That is why I call on everyone who has experienced sexual violence to seek help. Help equals self-love and self-care. I can say that my processing has only really started now.
It is not an easy path to freedom. The scars left on my soul have made me the Meera that I am today. And as painful as it may be, I am sure that the Meera of that time is very proud of the Meera of today.